Why this friendship is as deep as family

Friendship as deep as family is how Cindy Roberts, a mentor volunteer at Youth Moving On (YMO), described her seven-year relationship with Jammie Peterson on NBC 4’s television series, “Life Connected,” featuring individuals who pay it forward. Cindy’s effect  on Jammie has been profound and points to the indispensable role volunteers have on the children and youth we serve at Hillsides.

For Cindy, mentoring at YMO was her way to give back after finishing cancer treatment. At YMO she was introduced to Jammie who, at that time, was living in the supportive housing program. A friendship developed, and Cindy has served as a role model for her ever since. Now, in her own way, Jammie models for another generation of vulnerable children and youth that in spite of challenges much can be accomplished.

For youth at YMO, mentors like Cindy are essential. Always present to support and encourage, Cindy went beyond the usual mentor relationship by establishing a profound friendship with Jammie, welcoming her into her home, and serving as a faithful friend celebrating Jammie’s many achievements.

Even more extraordinary is that Cindy is a cancer survivor. Like many who have confronted their own immortality, perspective changes, nothing is taken for granted, and every opportunity is seized. Cindy’s commitment to Jammie is a testimony of her dedication and intent to make a difference.

Like Jammie, we have about 40 young people who are being served at YMO through various programs. These youth could benefit from a mentor--someone who can focus on them, interact without judgment, support unconditionally, and encourage consistently.

Often we underestimate what can be accomplished for foster youth who are striving for independence. As Thomas Lee, the division director of transition-aged youth services, mentioned in the television segment, the road to independence can be daunting for these young people. As much as we might understand the challenge and be empathetic, what these youth need more than anything else are people who can help them dream and patiently guide them as they set a direction to achieve it. These people would serve as mentors who genuinely believe in their potential.

Cindy was that person for Jammie and, as a result, they have become part of one another’s lives…truly life connected. Would you consider being a mentor? Could you give your time and energy to support one of our many young adults? The challenges are great, but the rewards can be life changing. Contact Thomas Lee at 626-765-6956 for more information on how you can become a mentor.

Why this decision by a children’s judge called for order in the court

A while back I asked a trusted advisor what would be the most effective  way to influence the child welfare system, he responded by saying that I should get involved in the judicial system where so many decisions are made regarding children in the State’s care. It was good advice and, as a result, I have begun to pay more attention to the court’s role in determining the services provided to the children and youth for whom we care.

This past week the efforts to establish a more open court room environment by the presiding judge of the Los Angeles County Juvenile Court, Michael Nash, was thwarted by a decision from the California appeals court to bar the press from covering juvenile dependency court hearings.

The fact that few journalists took advantage of Judge Nash’s open court is a mute point. His intent was to introduce another level of accountability into the judicial process and the child welfare system to observe total transparency. Given the convoluted nature of both systems such a dramatic approach would seem warranted. As laudable as Judge Nash’s effort were, the ruling to bar the press from such proceedings seems prudent. This judicial reversal should in no way diminish Judge Nash’s extraordinary legacy of advocacy. Without some effective measures of accountability the courts and child welfare system go unchecked in their well-intended, but often misguided efforts to serve the best interests of children and youth.

I agree with the California appeal court's ruling and would suggest that we need to find another way to hold the child welfare system accountable other than to introduce reporters into the court room. Perhaps what might be more effective is the development of public advocates whose sole purpose would be to assure that not only children’s rights are safeguarded, but that blatant inadequacies of the child welfare system are exposed. The mandated presence of such advocates in the court room may very well create the kind of transparency that Judge Nash so daringly introduced.

For the youth that appear in Juvenile Dependency Court, over exposure is a way of life fueled by their personal “entries” into social media mechanisms. The last thing any one of these vulnerable children need is a reporter using their case as justification for an exposé. While such cases may serve to concretize a particular point of view it does so while revealing the darker side of their stories. Such exposure can negatively define a person for life and, if nothing else, can be a source of embarrassment and shame. Often those we serve at Youth Moving On, a program for youth transitioning out of the fostercare system, are held back from attaining meaningful employment because of youthful indiscretions that have become part of their public record. While seeking transparency and accountability, we must not forget that lives can be significantly jeopardized by unwanted and gratuitous exposure.  

Energy harnessed

He is a tall lanky kid who looks older than his actual age. In his eyes you can see he is being tentative, still not sure of whether he should trust anyone yet. Slowly the abrupt behavior and reluctance to be engaged lessens. He begins selectively to tell his story, happy to break the intensity with a ride on his skateboard. His social worker sits back and patiently waits for his return and the treatment process to advance, the pace set by him.

Treatment of youngsters who have been traumatized by disappointment and tragedy can be slow, but well worth the patience and perseverance required when the end result is a childhood restored. This is what Hillsides is all about--to serve as a resource for children and families that allows for hurt to be addressed and a pathway to a fuller life identified.

As we approached our centennial year, Hillsides began the process of examining how we communicate who we are, what we do, and how we make a difference. As much as things have changed in 100 years, some things remain constant-- the commitment to high quality care, innovation, and advocacy. And so the task was to select an icon, a symbol, a mark that would convey our role as caregivers who make a lasting impact on the lives of all we serve, like the young resident mentioned earlier.

Many different logos were considered, all of them taking into account what we wished to communicate. When we considered the pinwheel there was an immediate, unanimous agreement that this symbol would serve well to convey what we are all about.

A familiar object associated with the carefree nature of childhood, pinwheels are recognized across generations and within many different cultures. As a toy, it never-the-less teaches a child about the ability to harness the energy of the wind to create movement and momentum. In and of itself, it is simple but intricate. When engaged, the pinwheel comes to life and can be so satisfying. It is a transformational object that reflects life fully enjoyed. In some cultures, it is a symbol of how obstacles can be turned into opportunities. For us, it seemed clear that there was no better symbol to reflect who we are, what we do, and how we impact lives.

Like all logos, it is effective only to the extent that it truly captures the essence of who we are; an organization dedicated to creating lasting change. The impact we make is not achieved by a marketing and communications campaign. The impact we make is the result of the extraordinary care of so many, staff and volunteers alike, who are clearly driven by a mission to create lasting change in the lives of all we serve.

Incredible, but True and Very Sad

The expression on the Board of Supervisor Michael Antonovich’s face that appeared in a photograph associated with an article on sexually exploited youth in the Los Angeles Times on Monday, December 3 says it all. According to the article, “more than half the juveniles arrested in LA County on prostitution-related charges have been under the care and supervision of DCFS.” Incredible, but true and very sad! To add insult to injury, these youth until the recent passage of the Proposition 35 have been treated as criminals rather than as victims of crimes by law enforcement.

How is it possible that children and youth in the care of the Department of Children and Family Services are lost to the streets and disappear into the nether world of homelessness, prostitution, and addiction? There just has to be a better way to serve such vulnerable youth and to avoid the tragedy of their sexual exploitation.

As mentioned previously on this blog, a young female resident of Youth Moving On, Hillsides’ housing and services program for former foster youth, mentioned to me that she aspires to serve youth trapped by gangs in the world of sexual trafficking. She struggled to gain her freedom from that environment and now serves as an advocate for these youth, helping them to transition away from gang involved prostitution to becoming independent. As with many of these youth, the first step is often a safe place to live.

Although we don’t offer a safe house program, we do reach out to these youth and counsel and support them as they struggle to free themselves from the grip of gang related activities. As always, we are quick to offer them a safe place to live once they can make that break and are resolved to take advantage of the services available through YMO.

Proposition 35 goes a long way in changing the law enforcement culture and will require greater attention to these exploited youth so they receive the care they need  instead of just being led off into the criminal justice system. But this does not address the failures of the child welfare system that somehow “lost” these children and youth to the streets in the first place.

Part of the solution does not just rest with the foster care system, but rather with the families of these children. One of the principal drivers in gang involvement is the need to belong and be protected. For most of us, the need to belong is provided in our family unit. Although it may seem counter intuitive, I think that all we do to find someone within the family of these very vulnerable youth to serve as an adult “anchor” for them accomplishes much in eliminating the need for them to look elsewhere  for the affection and care they deserve.

Certainly special training, increased supervision, better monitoring, and engaging programs would also serve to address the problem. But at the end of the day, it is that one adult, who always will be faithful, consistent, and dedicated that makes the difference in helping a vulnerable child satisfy the basic need to be loved.